SHOULD I STOP PRAYING FOR SOMEONE WHO DOES NOT WANT TO BELIEVE IN JESUS?
Sakkie Parsons
Someone wrote to me and told me about an atheist for whom she has been praying and sharing the gospel with for years, but the person continues to believe as he believes. Now she wants to know whether she should stop praying for him and stop sharing the gospel with him.
I also read between the lines that she would like their friendship to become more than just a platonic friendship, and I share with you my answer to her. Perhaps you know someone who might be in a similar kind of friendship relationship.
My answer would of course be exactly the same if it had been a man who wrote to me.
So here follows my answer to the person:
First, before I go any further—
NO, of course we should not stop praying for people whom we see, at this moment, are heading for a destination of hell. The place where they will spend eternity, if things remain as they are in their lives now, is too terrible even to think about—to simply allow them to rush unknowingly toward that dreadful abyss.
Just think—
To die the most terrible death forever and yet never die—to all eternity—and all the time while you are experiencing that dreadful condition, you know that you will never die.
I would now like to share with you what came to my mind after I read your letter to me.
As I mentioned—
Of course we must not stop praying for them, and we do not have to stop bringing them the gospel of Jesus either—but we should mainly change our way of bringing the gospel to them a little.
You have already told the person everything about the gospel of Jesus over a long period of time. So the person is not ignorant regarding this matter.
You have also made it clear during that time that you are a Christian. Well then, let him or her now clearly see in and through your life the family resemblance between you and Jesus.
In other words, much, much more “walk the walk”and much less“talk the talk.”
Then the person will visibly see the gospel in and through you—and together with that, the following from our Lord’s Word will then become true in his or her life:
Romans 10:20
But Isaiah is very bold and says: “I was found by those who did not seek Me; I was made manifest to those who did not ask for Me.”(Because of what he/she saw in and through your actions)
Now back to you again—because if you are emotionally involved, you may be in spiritual danger of death because satan is just waiting for an opening to spiritually tear you apart and devour you.
I do not know how you feel in your heart about your friend, but I can certainly share the following with you from our Lord’s precious Word:
The first thing I always say to people—and I am not saying this is necessarily what you wanted to know, but then you will have it if you perhaps know someone who should hear it—is this:
Never give your heart to someone if you do not already know with certainty that that person has given his or her heart to Jesus.
It is a recipe for the most terrible tragedy.
That is why our Lord also tells us very clearly through His Word:
2 Corinthians 6:14–16
Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?
And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?
And what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For you are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will dwell in them And walk among them. I will be their God, And they shall be My people.”
I have been proclaiming the gospel of Jesus for as long as I can remember—53 years—and personally I do not know of a single case of such a—let us call it—a “cross-pollination” that worked.
The only cases I have experienced that seemed to work on the surface, because the marriage appeared happy, were those where the believer eventually, over time, more or less gave up his or her faith—and personally I cannot imagine a greater tragedy than that: that someone, for the blink of an eye when compared with eternity, binds themselves to something that will cause them to end up in the most terrifying circumstances forever.
I have had someone say to me before—and in my experience it was usually a lady who said it:
“I will lead him to our Lord by marrying him.”
My answer to that is:
There are many ministries in the Word given to us to help lead people to Jesus—but marriage is not one of the ministries given to us to lead people to Jesus.
Just one last thought.
There also comes a time when a person must say:
Now I have truly done everything I can do from my side, and it is time to move on in my proclamation of the gospel.
Jesus once put it this way:
Matthew 10:11–15
Now whatever city or town you enter, inquire who in it is worthy (or who will listen to you), and stay there till you go out.(That is being led by the Holy Spirit to leave)
And when you go into a household, greet it.
If the household is worthy, let your peace come upon it. But if it is not worthy, let your peace return to you.
And whoever will not receive you nor hear your words, when you depart from that house or city, shake off the dust from your feet.
Assuredly, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for the land of Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment than for that city.
Why will it eventually be better for Sodom, for example, than for those people who did not want to listen to you and repent?
Well, it is actually obvious—
Sodom’s suffering, humanly speaking, came but also passed.
But the terrifying suffering of those who did not want to open their hearts to Jesus will continue forever and ever and ever.
What you and I must also remember, when we share Jesus’ loving gospel of saving grace with people, is how Jesus sees us while we share His gospel on His behalf—and we must also see ourselves that way and act accordingly:
Matthew 10:16
Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves. Therefore be wise as serpents and harmless as doves.
Groete,
Sakkie